Letter to Owen – July 31, 2018

July 31, 2018

My Dearest Owen,

I have a story to tell you. A story that is your own, that you may, or may not know:

The anticipation of every doctor’s appointment increases as we press further and further along, closer to viability outside of your mother’s womb. Over the weekend, your mother was not feeling well. Her blood pressure skyrocketed and she is now retaining fluid, just like you. She woke up on Sunday morning, feeling tired, and more than that, she was worried about her little boy. Her legs swollen like tightly packed sausages. We struggled through the day as if we just knew something had gone terribly wrong. Your brother was quite the handful, and we were at our wit’s end. We tossed and turned throughout the night, not sleeping as we should have. First thing on Monday morning, I called one of our specialists to be seen that day. We feared the worst. As I was praying that morning, I had a vision of your mother and I walking into the sonogram room. I saw the room, the sonographer and the screen. The feeling associated with this vision was that of sadness, defeat and utter broken-heartedness. I began to pray, pray and pray harder. At the same time, Pastor Jonny texted me, telling me that he felt a heaviness amongst our situation and he began to pray. I continuously prayed until walked into the same room that I saw in the vision that the Lord had given me, with the same sonographer that was seen as well. I prepared for impacted; preparing my heart for the news that you were no longer with us. How were we going to get through this? Why would the Lord provide up to this point and then decide to take you away now? My mind began to race. I sat down, staring at the television screen where the images of your body would be (just as I had done in the vision), but to my surprise, I saw your heat beating so strongly, just the same as it had always been! I was overcome with relief and began to thank the Lord for yet another day with you. However, I was confused, wondering how a vision that seemed to be from the Lord, could have been so wrong? I was reminded that sometimes the Lord will give us a word of looming foresight, but gives his saints (believers) a chance to pray, petition and plead to change the outcome. This is the power of prayer that is only now fully revealing itself to me. In the book of Isaiah, chapter 38, King Hezekiah was told by Isaiah to prepare his affairs, that the king would be dying soon. King Hezekiah cried out to the Lord, pleading with the Lord for more time. The Lord then told Isaiah that He had heard King Hezekiah’s prayer, and granted the king fifteen more years of life. Just as King Hezekiah pleaded with the Lord, so I plead with the Lord for your life, Owen.

You are already an inspiration to those who know you Owen. You are fighter, a little warrior and I am so proud of you. A father’s pride in his son is a beautiful thing to know and watch unfold. You, my son, make me proud. Keep fighting and I will keep pleading the cries of my heart to the Lord. You are truly a miracle, son. A miracle that has already, and will continue to bring people closer to the Lord. I am so proud.

 

 

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